20 of Joanna Lumley's most fabulous quotes

Tuesday, 9th January 2018, 09:51 am
Updated Tuesday, 9th January 2018, 09:51 am

Veteran actress Joanna Lumley has been announced as the presenter of the 2018 BAFTAs.

The news followed Stephen Fry's announcement last week that he would be stepping down as host after 12 year's service.

The former model's appointment was met by near-unanimous support from the showbiz world, with comedian David Baddiel branding the Absolutely Fabulous actress "a very gifted comic performer" and "a great choice" for the role on Twitter.

Joanna Lumley is, on top of everything else, a very gifted comic performer. She's a great choice to host #EEBAFTA.

— David Baddiel (@Baddiel) January 9, 2018

Known for her witty turns of phrase and comic performances we've compiled her most fabulous quotes to celebrate the new role.

"I don't feel like I am 66 at all. I feel more like I am 35. But I have a bus pass so it must be true."

"I never mind scrubbing floors, vacuuming or bending and carrying stuff. Each time I do it I think, this is instead of going to the gym."

"I don't feel like I am 66 at all. I feel more like I am 35. But I have a bus pass so it must be true." (Photo: JP)

“I've never felt the constraints of social acceptability.”

"I've looked forward to being older because you will have that many more miles covered. We mustn't be led into thinking getting old is bad. Growing old is good."

"I used to go out wearing any old rubbish, no make-up, nothing, but since mobile phones, that has all had to stop. People do come up to you so often and say hello, or want a photograph, and I just can't do it anymore in what I used to wear. They don't want to be seen hanging off a rabid old granny any more than I do."

"I have never had anything done to my face because then you end up looking as they all do in America."

"All you have to be is kind. That's all you need. Once you've got that, it virtually rules out everything else." (Photo: ITV)

"I've been dealing with the press for 45 years. You need a very long spoon to sup with them. While you are always grateful, they are like badly trained dogs. They smile and wag and bite your arm off."

"I think we could jam a bit more in our coffins than we do. I'm going to have some books, some I haven't finished or haven't read, some feathers and nice bits and pieces, the odd note. Just on the journey for the next bit."

"All you have to be is kind. That's all you need. Once you've got that, it virtually rules out everything else."

"Ryman is the one shop I can't go past without going into. I just can't resist lovely stationery."

"It took us 27 takes... 'Sorry Martin [Scorcese], didn't get that quite right. Can we go again?" (Photo: Paramount Pictures)"You can't be vain as an actor. In 'Ab Fab,' we were made up as old women with bald wigs and jowly necks, and we looked fantastic."

"That's the staggering, humorous thing about money. If you haven't got taste, money doesn't matter: You'll always look ghastly."

"I don't do girlfriendy sort of things, like shopping or going to spas. Spas fill me with horror. Frankly, I'd be more interested in doing a walk through the sewers of London!"

"A lot of us are ruled by fear during our lives - afraid we'll get burgled, afraid a dog will bite us, afraid we'll get fat, afraid someone will leave us. Once you lose fear, life becomes sweeter, and that happens as you get older. I'm sure by the time I'm 80, I'll be able to do absolutely anything!"

On kissing Leonardo DiCaprio in The Wolf of Wall Street: "it took us 27 takes... 'Sorry Martin [Scorcese], didn't get that quite right. Can we go again?"

"Sure, good things can go badly wrong. Nevertheless, there's always another day."

“It’s been so long since I actually remember going to sleep instead of passing out.” (Photo: BBC)

"I think you can tell a fashion victim by their handbag."

"Sometimes Jennifer Saunders and I will watch an episode together to get it back in our heads. Although of course it's secretly in my head all the time."

"You only have one go at life, which is thrilling. Only you can make yourself into who you want to be. Don't blame anybody else. You are entitled to free fresh air, and that's it. Do the rest yourself."

And finally, as Patsy Stone: “It’s been so long since I actually remember going to sleep instead of passing out.”